episodes: united states of tara, secret diary of a call girl

United States of Tara: I haven't really watched this show beyond the first two episodes, and with only four episodes to go, I doubt I'll go back and watch the ones I missed. But this last Sunday's episode was really fantastic, and it almost made me forget how oversimplified and stereotypical the alters are. I don't know much about Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), but I doubt it's as simple as "Alice deals with the maternal stuff, T comes out when there's too much adult stuff to deal with," etc. And although I LOVE the addition of Gimme -- a primitive, animal-like alter, complete with poncho and grunting sounds -- I don't know how realistic that is. I can understand an alter reverting back to a child-like state of mind, but an animal? My ignorance on this disorder allows me a double-function as a viewer: I can enjoy the projected images and situations, but I also have to question them. And one of the more interesting parts of this episode was Alice's announcement that she controls the other alters -- including, it seems, Tara. That makes sense, as Alice is the maternal 50s housewife, but it's interesting to think of "normal Tara" in the same realm as "hillbilly Buck."

But back to Sunday's episode. I thought it was well-written, as in, it had a really great flow throughout the singular narratives. The transition from Tara to Alice over vomiting was especially inspired; a moment that triggers a repulsive reflex turns into a revelatory moment, "I'm pregnant!" I enjoyed Max and the other children humoring Alice's fake pregnancy because this dismissive attitude really turned full circle at the end of the episode (when Tara gets her period and Alice thinks she's miscarried) and Max comes to comfort her on the bathroom floor. The episode also allowed some bonding between Alice, daughter Kate, and sister Charmaine. I think Charmaine has some underlying sexual chemistry with Max, and I don't know if the show is going to explore that, but her rejection of Tara's identity disorder has always been interesting to me. Tara's "chosen" family loves and accepts it, but her blood relation doesn't? I feel like there might actually be some truth to Tara faking it (which I don't think Showtime will do because they would get so many complaints from the medical community). Last week Charmaine bonded with Buck, and now she's bonded with Alice. These have been interesting situations to put Charmaine in. I also have to comment on Marshall's church show -- which, as anti-organized religion as it was, I know people like this, people who would put the Village People in hell and demonstrate a demonized version of getting an abortion. It honored this mindset (people at the show were disgusted, which was the point), but it also made fun of their oversimplification of morality. Also, as a last note, Nate Corddry plays creepy really well. His postmodern video sonnet was ten shades of disturbing.

Secret Diary of a Call Girl: Here is my biggest problem with this show. Nothing substantial ever happens, and when it does, it's as though it didn't. Case in point: I missed the last two episodes, and in one of those, Belle broke up with Alex (the very scrumptious Calum Blue) and then rebounded with Ben, her best friend. I watch Sunday's episode -- the second season finale -- and it's as though Belle never slept with Ben. They're still friends? There's no fall out? There are no lingering feelings? And according to the recap at the beginning, Ben broke up with Vanessa. So where does this leave his feelings for Belle? Not only that, but because this show only has ten episodes per season,* something like the Ben-Belle hookup should have been a monumental forward-driving plot point. It should NOT have been contained to one or two episodes. It's very frustrating the way this show absolutely refuses to develop its characters. Belle isn't likable, and there's not much to recommend her. Ben is fine, but he's only given three-to-five minutes of screen time each episode. The story arc of Belle falling in love and giving up her career as an escort should have been monumental, but instead it was just "something that happened." And the reveal that Alex was testing her, seeing if she had really given up her career for him, should have been shocking but it was predictable and not sad. I should've felt bad for Belle. I should've felt bad for Alex. But I just. didn't. care. I've finally decided -- I'm not going to watch this show anymore. It has such potential to be really good, and instead, it insists on being crap television. And why -- why -- is the makeup department so hell-bent on making Piper look as ridiculous as possible? The bright pink and purple lipstick wasn't enough? They had to give her clown hair? Does that somehow hide her pregnancy...?

* I don't know if future seasons will also have ten episodes. The first season had ten, I imagine, because it was a new show and Britain was testing out its watchability factor. The season season, though, should have had more episodes, right? But perhaps Billie Piper's -- very obvious! -- real-life pregnancy kept the episodes at a minimum? Either way, ten-episode seasons are not nearly long enough to develop any character arc.

mid-season TV review: part II

Here's the second round of the TV season reviews...


30 Rock: Well, considering there's only been three episodes thus far... I always enjoy myself during this show. I think the characters are fantastically hyperreal and yet entirely relatable and understandable. But this show is great for it's sight gags (see clip above -- is that... a claw?) and it's one-line jokes (typically from Jack, Tracy, and Kenneth). Speaking of Kenneth, how great was this line: "I don't believe in hypotheticals. It's like lying to your brain." The goods: I loved Will Arnette in the premiere (but I missed the world's shortest robe). The Oprah guest stint was well played out -- but only because Liz Lemon was talking to who a 12-year-old who, due to her drugged out condition, made Lemon think she was sitting next to Oprah. So far, the best part of the season was a throw-away line from Jack. He mentioned that he met his assistant Jonathan while drugged out on a plane trip, and he thought he was actually sitting next to M. Night Shyamalan. The bads: Jenna's character still isn't fleshed out very well (though her "black walk" while singing The Wiz was hilarious).


Dexter: I'm just not into this show, and I can't believe Showtime ordered two more seasons. I can honestly say that I probably won't watch them. I'm getting annoyed with the (now) seasonal theme redundancy. Dexter-the-serial-killer finally finds someone who knows his secret and still loves him -- in Season 1 it was his brother, who he had to kill, and in Season 2 it was his girlfriend, who he also had to kill -- and now it's Miguel Prado, a blood-thirsty DA. Is there any doubt that Miguel will die at the end of the season? He's a bit too eager to kill, and I don't think that will sit well with Dexter. The goods: Michael C. Hall's performance is why you watch this show. The bads: The writers keep telling us that Dexter can't feel emotions -- as evidenced in most of Dexter voiceovers -- and yet Dexter had showcased genuine emotion on multiple occasions. Also, there's way too much drama with the supporting characters. They're supposed to be fun characters. Why is Deb's constant cursing no longer funny?


Eli Stone: Honestly, this is one of my favorite shows. I'm not religious, so I don't watch this show for the faith aspect. Season 1 was great in that it balanced between Eli lacking faith and needing science to explain his prophetic visions, and in Season 2, Sigourney Weaver played God's assistant (?) and told Eli that his visions are in fact from God, and this was pretty much accepted as fact because if Eli didn't have the visions then his brother Nate did. Johnny Lee Miller is so fantastic as the lead, and he's so engaging and interesting that I want to follow him. The other characters are getting better as well, especially Jordan and Taylor, neither of whom I cared for last season. But why is Maggie still here? She's beyond annoying. The goods: The building collapse episode was well done, and it allowed for a natural shift for Jordan to branch out into his own firm. I also loved this week's episode where Matt Dowd grew a conscience but couldn't handle it. "I like to sleep at night," he said, knowing full well what he was walking away from. The bads: Maggie. Maggie. And, at this point, everyone involved with Eli has experienced his visions directly, and yet, depending on what the narrative calls for, everyone seems to switch between believing him and calling him a crackpot. For me, I think only his brother Nate should believe him. Everyone else should be skeptical. Oh, and I don't like Maggie.


How I Met Your Mother: I have absolutely no idea how this show's doing. I didn't start watching until this season, and I'm a bit irked that we're so far along and we still haven't met the mother -- or if we have, it still isn't known to us, which means it's also not known to the main character's kids. The show's premise is about a guy telling his kids how he met their mother, when instead it should be called The History of My Adult Love-Life (And Your Mother's Involved Somewhere). I know that I should ignore that just enjoy the storylines, but then the writers should have made the storytelling a gimmick rather than the premise. At any rate, I enjoy all of the characters -- especially Barney, always Barney -- and the quotidian situations are usually relatable enough to be entertaining (like searching for the perfect hamburger). But I don't really care about these characters. My heart's not invested in any of them. And all comedies need their Ross and Rachel, their Pam and Jim. So why is the audience rooting for Ted and "Aunt Robin"? The goods: The jokes are extremely well written, and the deliveries are even better. The bads: Why are these characters stuck in a perpetual state of growing up without becoming adults?


Big Bang Theory: Everyone loves Sheldon and he's obviously the star of the show, but why aren't the supporting characters -- and the other main character, Leonard -- spotlighted more? I think this show really excels when things take place in the workplace as opposed to the apartments. The goods: I geek out over science talk, and any BSG reference automatically wins me over. Also, Sara Gilbert joined the cast and she's fantastic -- but why hasn't she been in more episodes? The bads: I'm not sure what happened between Penny and Leonard. They went on a date but it didn't work out, and yet Leonard still pines over her? They need to have more scenes together, alone. Lately Penny's had so many scenes with Sheldon (this week's episode pitted them against one another as the A-storyline) that I wonder if the writers are going to make them closer because Sheldon's the star of the show and Penny's the only female.


Desperate Housewives: The show is DEFINITELY better than last year, and the five-year leap forward helped. I mean, how much trouble can Wisteria Lane get into every year? But I have a hard time believing that Bree's daughter Danielle suddenly came and took her son back (what a ridiculously convenient way to get rid of a child on the set), and I don't think Gaby would forget how to style her hair just because she has two kids. Yes, she might not do her hair and makeup every day, but when she does go out, I would think she would go ALL out. And Gaby's fashion sense completely went out the window. If Gaby's strapped for cash, she's going to wear a t-shirt and jeans. She's not going to wear mismatched color schemes and layer clothes that shouldn't be layered. On the plus side, Susan's anti-relationship storyline was good (but now she's committing to what's-his-face and her character's losing edge again). The goods: Neal McDonough is fabulous, but why is Mrs. McCluskey his biggest foe? Also good is Bree's marriage trouble with Orson. It makes sense that they would have trouble adjusting to both Bree's newfound fame and Orson's post-prison life. The bads: So in that missing five-year span, Tom suffered a heart attack and is now going through his mid-life crisis, and yet he tells Lynette, who went through chemotherapy and lost her hair because of cancer, that she doesn't understand? Did he forget that his wife almost died? And why don't the housewives have scenes together anymore? No one goes over for drinks or to play cards anymore? The storylines are too isolated from one another.

episodes: weeds, secret diary of a call girl

Weeds: First of all, I miss the opening theme song. I understand that the "little boxes" are no longer relevant, but now there's nothing. No song. No hook or catch. Just clever images that somehow incorporates pot into it. And wow. This season is ridiculous, and not in a good way. More like a writers-went-with-their-first-drafts kind of way. I like that Silas has started a relationship with an older woman (played by Julie Bowen), but I don't like that her character was not given a reason for being with a seventeen-year-old boy. All we know about her is that she works at a cheese shop and has a ten-year-old son. And, although I don't like gratuitous female nudity, I don't think the proper response is for equal gratuitous male nudity. Hunter Parrish has a beautiful body, but did I need to see his butt as he went to third base with his new friend? Even though the actor is twenty-one, his character is underage and it makes me feel gross. (And we'll get to jaw-droppingly disgusting in a moment...)

I enjoyed Albert Brooks's cranky gambling grandfather, and although I thought his exit was unrealistic, I do think he had to leave. But why is the entire gang back? Celia's integration into her new life was a complete waste (not to mention implausible and uninspired), and why is Doug still around? He's a fantastic character to have around (it's hilarious that a brief encounter with a Mexican refugee has turned him into a coyote), but the reason for him being there was ridiculously lame. And why does Nancy allow men to use her for sex? And why is sexuality her only weapon? Flashbacks of her and Judah made her seem like a good person at one point, but she's a terrible mess of a person. And on to the most disgusting thing I've ever seen on TV... and I've seen a lot of TV... Nancy's son, Shane, is masturbating to pictures of his naked mother. Umm, what? And why are the naked pictures done by a professional photographer? If I didn't enjoy Justin Kirk so much, I would've given up on this show a long time ago.

P.S. Hunter Parrish is set to star as Melchior in Spring Awakening in September. It's a crazy good show (the music/synopsis, anyway), and I'm surprised to learn that Parrish can sing. Kind of hot.


Secret Diary of a Call Girl: The show is now 85% sex, 15% character development. If only we can scale it back to 60-40, I'd be happy. The character Ben is growing on me, but it's really irritating that Hannah's character only grows when she's around him. I understand that the show requires her to discuss her career (like a diary), but aren't these confessions/acknowledgements also about her? If the episode's storylines are metaphors, they're not very strong ones. One of her clients is into S&M; she's not. What does that mean for her? It just tells us, the viewers, that she's not a fetishistic prostitute. She's classy. And I don't quite understand how Ben can engage in a couples session with Hannah and strangers and not feel weird about it, especially since he's getting married to Vanessa (who, as far as I know, we've never seen). The 85-15 setup isn't working for me, but Hannah's character is slowly starting to grow, so I'll stick around for a bit longer. And I still don't think Billie Piper is very attractive.

weeds, secret diary of a call girl: premieres

Weeds: Not your typical premiere. No big bang, just character development and putting the storyline into place. Nancy and her bandit family have left Agrestic, and I think this premiere will be the last time we hear "Little Boxes" over the titles. I was wary of the addition of Albert Brooks as Judah and Andy's father - since I have never laughed at anything he's said - but his delivery of "You're eating German food in my mother's living room, and you smell of gas? She was at Aushwitz, for Christ's sake" was well done. My favorite line of the episode goes to Nancy (Mary-Louise Parker): Upon hearing about brother-in-law Andy's masturbation stains, "Great, my children are sleeping next to their unborn cousins." Now, these are awful people, and I don't deny that (and the show doesn't even try to hide it). In numerous occasions, Nancy could have left the drug-dealing world and made an honest woman out of herself and provided (legally) for her children. Andy is a screw-up who shows no signs of changing his ways. Celia is the front-runner for World's Worst Mother. And Silas needs to be punched. BUT they're an interesting bunch, and the blending of irony and comedy entertains me. Not a strong premiere, not much happened (other than finding a new residence), but I have high hopes for this season. New things.

Secret Diary of a Call Girl: Umm... I was hoping that this show would be more about loss of identity/absence of the self than it would be about sex. In 24 minutes, Hannah (call girl name Belle), played by Billie Piper, had sex with two men twice. On average, that's sex every 6 minutes. And those scenes last about 3-4 minutes... which leaves roughly 10 minutes left for character development and set up. Hannah has a best friend (Ben?) but he rarely had any lines, let alone time, to develop a character. BUT there was one moment - maybe a whole sixty seconds - where Hannah called Ben, who did not answer, and it showcased her vulnerability. There was a close-up montage of her looking around (which was a boring way of showing boredom) and lighting a cigarette (sexy?). These close-ups were screaming, "Hey, audience! She's lonely! She's torn between her private and professional lives!" If the show is going to continue the looking-at-the-screen narration, the narration needs to be more philosophical and insightful - a la Sex and the City. The premiere was little more than fetishistic sex (a horse saddle ride?) and retrogressive feminism ("I like sex, and I like money" is Hannah's justification/explanation for her career). The only insight came in the last few seconds, where she, via voiceover, says she can only be with a man who doesn't want to be with the real her. She has to dump a client who wants no makeup and jeans, no shoes in the house. She needs clients who want the fantasy. I'll watch a few more episodes, but please, for love of God, change the title sequence. Fragmentation was so eighteen years ago (ahem, Pretty Woman, ahem).

Side Note: Hey, Showtime, could you be a little more blatant with your Women=Sex campaign? I don't think the message is coming across... come on, a bathing suit in a potted plant and a mini-dress in a martini glass? And in high heels?